Gail Goolsby, an educator and life coach, encourages women to learn how to live well. In this Christmas UPGRADE, she explains how Mary, mother of Jesus, lived wisely and well—and she encourages us to do the same during the tradition of Advent.
“Recently I read Lost Women of the Bible by Carolyn Custis James,” Gail said.
“I discovered an expanded image of Jesus’ mother, Mary, beyond the virginal blue headscarf of Christmas nativity scenes.”
I (Dawn) am so glad Gail wrote on this topic. I think many Christ-followers misunderstand Mary—who she was and how the Lord called her into something hard yet beautiful. Beautiful beyond her imagination.
Gail continues . . .
Custis James described how Mary prepared for the COMING of her baby, the Messiah, and how she prepared for LOSING Him.
Through His painful sacrifice, she lost her son, yes, but gained eternal salvation and peace with God.
Mary’s model of heart preparation for all that was coming to her life motivated me to enhance my own Advent season of worship and reflection.
Advent Tradition
The word Advent means coming, derived from the Latin word adventus. Modern day Christians recognize the four weeks before Christmas as the Advent season to celebrate the wonderous arrival of Jesus the God-man.
For centuries this coming preparation did not focus on Christ’s birth but His second coming as King and Redeemer. Only during the Middle Ages did Christians begin to explicitly link the Advent season to Christ’s first coming at Christmas.
Today we combine the two targets of Advent.
- We anticipate the glorious reappearance of the judge of the world through the clouds.
- We remember the tender birth of a baby to a young mother in a humble shelter.
The first two Advent Sundays look forward to Christ’s second coming with songs like O Come, O Come Emmanuel.
The last two Sundays look backward to recount His first coming and lead us to Christmas Day. We rejoice with the angels and shepherds, singing the carols we love like Hark the Herald and Silent Night.
Advent Public Preparation
Historically, Christians prepared for Advent in similar ways to Easter, with prayer and fasting.
During a month of traditional parties and feasts, fasting can be challenging, yet can help center us on the reason for the season.
- The addition of Advent scriptures and prayers by congregant families in the weekly church worship service points us to the future and past comings of our Lord.
- Devotionals and special readings at home with family members gives reflection time direction and meaning.
- Parents often add a count-down calendar or place daily ornament-symbols on a holiday tree
with their children while teaching Old and New Testament verses about Christ. - Advent wreaths with four to five candles in significant colors set among greenery with blood-red berries are popular decorations in churches and homes. Each candle depicts a piece of the waiting and remembering story of Christ’s two comings.
Mary’s Personal Preparation
In Custis James’ presentation of Mary, I found THREE POSTURES that can prepare our hearts for welcoming the person and deity of Christ in our Advent practices.
1. Lose ourselves
As Mary agreed to take on the role of mother to Jesus, she lost
- her reputation,
- her engagement/marriage in cultural acceptance,
- her personal dreams and goals, and for a time
- the trust of her fiancé and family.
When her unthinkable situation became public, she lost
- personal safety and
- community tolerance.
Mary laid down her full earthly identity to become God’s servant.
Custis James wrote (page 167),
“Mary got lost in the very place where ultimately she was found—in her relationship with her son.”
2. Let go and let Jesus be Jesus
Beginning with the story of twelve-year-old Jesus remaining behind in Jerusalem after celebrating Passover, Mary and Joseph had to release their son to live out His destiny. Jesus shifted His authority allegiance from his parents to His Father in heaven.
Several times in scripture we see Him explaining this obedience to God versus His earthly family (Luke 2: 48-49; John 2:4; Luke 8:19-21).
Like Mary and Joseph and his brothers, we must relinquish our human ideals of relating to Jesus and discover Him as He truly is—fully God and fully man.
3. Embrace our destiny
Just as Mary’s fullest calling was not serving as the birth vehicle for Jesus, we must recognize our greatest identity is found in following Christ.
If Mary had not embraced her son’s spiritual teachings, her supernatural motherhood would have meant little.
An unnamed woman cried out, “Blessed is the mother who gave you birth and nursed you” (Luke 11:27 NIV).
Jesus replied in Luke 11:28: “Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.”
Custis James wrote (page 180), “Mary was the first to believe and lay down her life for the gospel. She was the first to leave all to follow Jesus, first to love him and minister to his body, first to hear and treasure his words, the first to share in his sufferings.”
The promise for each of us and the world is Jesus Christ.
He has come, and He will come again.
This is the essence of Advent.
How will you prepare yourself? Follow the model of Mary.
Gail Goolsby, MA, MEd, ACC is a lifelong educator, including past leadership at an international school in Afghanistan, and credentialed life coach with the International Coach Federation. Gail and her pastor husband of 40 years live where the wind blows over the prairie in south Kansas. She counsels and coaches using God’s Word to help others learn to live well.