How to Have a GLEEFUL Summer

Sue Badeau has had a lot of experience with children (read her bio, below!), and she has lots of wisdom to offer not just about parenting, but also about embracing life with joy. I love this super summer UPGRADE!

“As a child, I couldn’t wait for summer,” Sue writes. “What’s not to love? Fireflies. Popsicles. Campfires. Books. Barbeques. Beaches.

“As an adult I dreaded summer.  What’s not to hate? Ants and Mosquitos. Oppressive humidity. Sunburns. Poison Ivy. And this body in a bathing suit? NOOOOOOO!”

HA! That’s the best description of summer—pros and cons—I (Dawn) have ever read!

Sue continues …

Memorial Day 1985. Only May and temperatures were already blistering. It was our first summer with multiple foster children—three teen boys— along with our “littles” (five kids under the age of five!). The prospect of a hot, miserable summer drained the life right out of me. Like the Psalmist said,

“My vitality was drained away as with the fever heat of summer” (Psalm 32:4).

And then I looked around at the gleeful faces on my beautiful children as they ran back and forth under the sprinkler their awesome dad had set up on the lawn.

I decided that I was going to find a way to change my own attitude from “grumpy” to “gleeful” and take summer back!

I developed a seven-step plan for upgrading my summer from grumpy to gleeful. Perhaps my plan will help you upgrade your own summer as well!

The underlying principle is to become like a child.

Summer was made for children and childlike wonder. “Children are the kingdom’s pride and joy. Mark this: Unless you accept God’s kingdom in the simplicity of a child, you’ll never get in” (Luke 18:15-17, The Message).

You can do all of these things on your own, even as a fifty-something “empty-nester,” but they are better when shared with a child—so grab your children, grandchildren or neighbor’s children and get your glee on!

1. GROW something: Get your hands dirty. Experience the thrill of eating a tomato from the vine, letting the juices run down your chin. Bring new life to the lesson of the sower and seeds.

2. LEARN something: Read. Check out that museum in town you’ve never visited. Add a new word to your vocabulary every day. Practice sign language.

3. ELIMINATE something: Put the song “Let it Go!” on. Sing it loudly—off-key is okay!—and get rid of stuff. Donate. Recycle. Toss. It’s freeing.

4. EXPLORE & Experiment: Try something new. That first “gleeful” summer we boldly took eight kids on a cross-country camping trip. We explored and took risks. We experimented with the idea that we could live as frugally on the road as we could at home. And we did!

5. FLIP over something: Somersault on the lawn. Jump on the trampoline. Cannonball into the pool. Be silly and find what excites you. Catch fireflies. Watch fireworks. Be present, in the moment, completely head-over-heals enjoying the activity at hand.

6. UPLIFT someone: One year, our kids held weekly lemonade stands to raise money for earthquake victims in Haiti. Find your passion and make a difference.

7. LEAVE a lasting LEGACY: More than anything money can buy, children crave your time and presence. Sleep under the stars. Tell ghost stories by candlelight during a thunderstorm.

To this day, the memories our now-grown children talk about the most are from the lazy, hazy, crazy and gleeful days of summer. Don’t sit it out being grumpy.

Upgrade to a GLEEFUL summer—what’s not to love? Fireflies. Popsicles. Campfires. Books. Barbeques. Beaches. And always, amazing memories!

Which of these “get your glee on” ideas inspired you? How can you “become like a child” today?

Sue Badeau is a nationally known speaker, author, and child welfare and trauma expert. Sue and her husband Hector are lifetime parents of twenty-two children—two by birth and twenty adopted. They wrote the book Are We There Yet: The Ultimate Road Trip Adopting and Raising 22 Kids. Sue’s new Kindle book is Volume 3, “Never Too Old” in the Summer in Sweetland series. Learn more about Sue at suebadeau.com and badeaufamily.com.

Graphic in Text adapted: Image courtesy of marin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Bricks into Cathedrals

Sue Badeau is an amazing, caring woman. She loves to give children roots and wings. She and her husband are the lifetime parents of twenty-two children (two by birth and twenty through adoption). She knows a lot about “care-giving,” and I invited her to share some insights with us.

“As a caregiver, when you feel like you’re running into brick walls,” Sue says, “you’re well on the way to supporting healing and wholeness for your loved one.”

I have to tell you, I [Dawn] wept when I read this post. My own sister was a caregiver for my grandmother, and now she cares for my mom. I can’t wait to share this precious post with her.

Sue continues …

Caregiving is hard and may feel like there’s no end in sight. Whether caring for a child, spouse, sibling or aging parent coping with physical or mental challenges, grief or trauma, we need a hopeful vision.

A folktale challenges us to reframe our perspective:

A person on a journey came upon workers laying bricks. She stopped, asking the first, “What are you doing?”

“I’m laying bricks,” the first worker replied.

Not satisfied, she asked a second worker, “What are you doing?”

“I’m building a great and strong brick wall.”

Still seeking to better understand, the wayfarer asked a third worker, “What are you doing?”

The third worker responded with enthusiasm, “I’m building a soaring cathedral to last throughout time, drawing men and women to the glory of God."*

Laying bricks is important work. Each contributes to the whole. But don't focus solely on bricks. Upgrade your perspective. Today’s caregiving tasks are bricks helping the person you love to achieve his or her life purpose with dignity. Can you envision the sturdy wall you are building with today’s bricks?

Now, upgrade again. Stretch your vision to extend beyond the wall until you see the soaring cathedral. Are you able to enthusiastically and purposefully undertake your role contributing bricks, one-by-one, to the cathedral—even if it takes years or decades to complete? 

Effective parents and caregivers must have a soaring vision and then work towards this vision on a daily basis. 

“Where there is no vision, the people perish” (Proverbs 29:18).

Here are four tips for upgrading your life by developing and implementing cathedral visions to sustain you through the brick-laying work of parenting and caregiving:

(1) Imagine the future. What are all the hopes and possibilities for the child or person you are caring for? Engage the person him or herself in describing their own “cathedral.” Dream big!

(2) Place a visual representation of your “cathedral” to be seen daily. Whenever you’re discouraged, it’ll remind you of the cathedral you’re building! 

For example, one of our daughters was told she’d never walk due to cerebral palsy. She longed to dance. Her vision of dancing was her hope for a future of self-expression and independence. We placed a music box with a ballerina on top on her dresser. It was a visual reminder of the reason we slogged through difficult physical therapy (brick-laying) exercises.

(3) Break the vision into smaller components. Just as a cathedral-builder’s blueprint will include the layout of all necessary walls (See I Kings 6-7), for our daughter, components included learning to feed and dress herself, walk and climb stairs. 

(4) Prepare to make adjustments. Our daughter’s love for dance was the inspiration she—and we—needed to lay bricks for her to become the person God created her to be.

Today she is able to dance, but she is not defined as a dancer. Her cathedral changed as it soared to new heights. She is an independent adult, raising two children. The dance vision wasn’t the full cathedral, but it gave us all the perspective we needed to keep at it day after day.

Who are you caring for, laying bricks each day? Can you upgrade this to a Cathedral vision? (How about your own life—are you building a Cathedral?) Sue (and Dawn) would love to hear about your caregiving experiences.

Sue Badeau is a nationally known speaker, author, child welfare and trauma expert. Sue and her husband, Hector, are lifetime parents of twenty-two children, two by birth and twenty adopted. They wrote the book Are We There Yet: The Ultimate Road Trip Adopting and Raising 22 Kids. Learn more about Sue at suebadeau.com and badeaufamily.com. 

* Cathedral story adapted, author unknown. Photo of the cathedral taken by Sue Badeau.