When Mom Is in Heaven . . .

In this Mother's Day UPGRADE, Dawn reminds us to honor our moms for as long as we can. Why? "When Mom is in heaven," she says, "a big piece of our heart is there too." This is my first Mother's Day without my mom; and my husband's mother went to heaven in late 2021.

A few days after I wrote this post, I received news that a dear friend's elderly mother was in transition. Family members have gathered, and they will likely experience Mother's Day without their mom too.

The simple fact is, Mother's Day looks a lot different when a loving Christian Mom is dying or already in heaven with Jesus.

It's just so hard!

My sister was my mom's caregiver for so many years. I know she is hurting too. While there is relief when our loved one is out of pain, caregivers also experience great sorrow.

People speak of "losing" someone in death, but I haven't lost my mom. I know exactly where she is.

Knowing Mom is safe and well in the place where she lives forever helps me deal with the pain.

More about that later.

Perhaps someone reading this is struggling. I hope this will encourage you.

Five things to remember when facing Mom's earthly absence on Mother's Day:

1) It's normal to grieve.

I watched a television commercial promoting a lovely Mother's Day necklace. A tear slipped from my eye. Never again this side of heaven would I be able to give my mom a gift of any kind. Not even a Mother's Day card.

We can change the channel when the commercial comes on and avoid the card aisle at the drugstore, but that won't bring her back.

Grieving is natural, and no one can tell us when to stop grieving.

We can look at old scrapbooks of special events with our mom in the photos, but suddenly we realize there will be no more photos. We close the scrapbook. It's just too hard.

In time, a new awareness sets in.

In grieving, we eventually realize that great grief means great love.

If we did not love our mothers so much, we would not grieve them so deeply.

So what helps?

• Pause for a while and feel the depths of your grief.
• Then take your pain to Jesus—totally human, totally God—the One who understands how you feel. He is intimately acquainted with your situation (Psalm 139:b NASB). You are not alone. He does not stand back, avoiding your pain. He wants to comfort your heart through the watch-care of the Holy Spirit.

2) Some memories are sweet, others are hard, and some are funny!

After pausing to feel grief, allow your thoughts to drift to happy days when your mother was still on earth. Ask God to help you remember some sweet memories.

It's OK for tears to flow.

Memories can still be sweet, even when difficult or painful.

We can know that, as Bible-believing believers, someday all those tears of grief will be wiped away, and death, mourning, crying, and pain will end (Revelation 21:4).

In the midst of grieving your mother's death, perhaps you will recall some funny memories. That's OK!

Some of my favorite funerals and celebration services included funny stories of the deceased. Loved ones laughed through their tears.

Stories are reminders that the one we love was completely human and will be missed.

So what helps?

• If you feel comfortable, pull out that scrapbook again, or look at photos on social media or on your phone.
• Try to remember the place and time for each picture. Choose joy, and thank God for the memories.

(Bob's mother, left, and mine — when they were young.)

3) It's God-honoring and mom-honoring to remember her legacy.

All moms leave some kind of legacy. This is hopefully doubly true in Christian families. There is Mom's legacy in family traditions, and her legacy in Christ.

Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his faithful servants (Psalm 116:15 NIV).

If your mom lived even nominally for Jesus, that's more than the vast number of moms have done around the world—moms who have never trusted in the Lord. It's not that those other moms don't love their children. It's only that they could not show the love of God to their children.

If your mom walked closely with her Savior, however, she will likely have left a profound "heartprint" in your life—transformational truth, and inspiration to follow her heart as you follow in Jesus' steps.

So what helps?

• Your mom may not have been perfect, but thank God for giving you life (Psalm 139:13) and the legacy of her love. If she taught you about the Lord, His Word, and His ways, praise God for that (Deuteronomy 4:9; Proverbs 1:8-9).
• Thank God for her influence in your character and your understanding of Father God (Proverbs 31:25-27).

4) Life now is about more than trying to "make Mom proud."

Proverbs 17:6b (NLT) says,

Parents are the pride of their children. *

It's natural that children take pride in their parents. That's why we have special days to celebrate them—Father's Day and Mother's Day. God tells us to honor our parents (Exodus 20:12); and the scriptures go one step further with moms: We must never "despise" (neglect) them when they are old (Proverbs 23:22b).

Yes. It's good to take pride in our parents.

Children also normally want to make their parents proud.

It's suggested that Mom is glad when we're making wise choices.

May your . . . mother rejoice; may she who gave you birth be joyful!" (Proverbs 22:25).

Most parents are happily proud of their children, even if they don't communicate it. Parental pride and gladness are often linked. I remember telling one of my sons after he displayed an act of kindness, "I'm so glad you were born. I'm so proud of you."

You may hope that you made your mama proud; and that feeling may continue after she's in heaven.

But your mother would want MORE for you.

Your mom would want you to live a wonderful, fruitful, God-blessed life. She would want you to live for more than simply making her proud.

She would want you to make God smile.

Turns out, that's a biblical concept.

May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you. May the Lord show you his favor. . .  (Numbers 6:25-26a NLT)

God smiles when He sees His children looking to Him for wisdom and direction. When we seek Him out for the right way to live (Psalm 119:35 Msg), He pours out His favor in our lives.

Your mom wouldn't want you to become a sour, legalistic Christian. But she would want you to walk in submission, faith, and obedience to God because that's the way to a blessed life.

So what helps?

• Why not write a note in your journal or to post on social media to celebrate your Mom's life—rise up and "call her blessed" (Proverbs 31:28). Your mom may be in heaven, but you can still share part of her story or why you loved her.
• Ask God how you can make Him smile. What would that look like? What would move God's heart to bless you? The Bible gives some insight: Hosea 6:6 NLT; Psalm 147:11 ESV; 1 John 5:3a NIV; Matthew 6:33 NIV)

5. We know we will see our Christ-following Mom again.

Only God knows our hearts, but if your mother has genuinely received Jesus as her Savior (trusting in His death, burial, and resurrection; and repenting of sin and asking for His forgiveness) — and you have genuinely done the same — you will see your loved one again.

Again, what helps?

• Praise God for your mother's salvation. ** (She's not only your mom. If you both know the Lord, she's your sister in Christ!)
• Be sure you know the Lord too. (How do you know—how can you be sure—you know Jesus? Here is a presentation of the good news of salvation in Christ; and here are some evidences of salvation.)

I cannot wait to see my mom, my husband's mom, and a few precious adopted "moms" I've loved along the way. What a wondrous day that will be!

Let me offer a prayer for those who hurt this Mother's Day.

Father God,

I ask you to encourage those who have mothers in heaven. Comfort them and bring them peace.

Remind them of sweet memories so they will have tears of joy mingled with their grief.

Show them how they can best honor their mothers this Mother's Day and in the years to come. Amen.

Is your mom in heaven? Could you try some of these suggestions to face this Mother's Day with peace, and a "heavenly" perspective?

Dawn Wilson, founder and President of Heart Choices Today, is a speaker and author, and the creator the blog, Upgrade with Dawn. She is a contracted researcher/reviewer for women's teacher and revivalist, Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth at Revive Our Hearts, and is a regular columnist at Crosswalk.com. She and her husband Bob live in sunny Southern California, and Dawn has traveled with Him in Pacesetter Global Outreach. They have two grown, married sons, three granddaughters and a rascally maltipoo, Roscoe.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Vlanka at Pixabay.

* Note: Most versions say "father" rather than "parents."

** I know that some moms give no evidence of receiving Christ. We cannot, however, see into their heart and mind. Perhaps they had a conversation wth God before they died. We just do not know—but God does. We can take comfort in the biblical truth that God is loving, kind, and just. And we can thank Him for the years He allowed our Mom to care for us.

Feeling Like a Failure as a Mom?

Kathy Collard Miller is treasure, shaped by God for specific ministry—reaching women who deal with anger issues, and teaching how to be a positive parent. In this Parenting UPGRADE, she reaches out to women who feel like failures in motherhood—an insightful post before Mother's Day.

"Don’t be alarmed," Kathy says. "Every mother at one point or another feels like a failure, but that doesn’t mean God doesn’t have help to improve her parenting skills."

I (Dawn) like that word "every." I am not alone in my mothering regrets. All mothers wish we could go back and redo something in our imperfect parenting. But what does God have to say about this?

Kathy continues . . .

If anyone could say they are a failure as a mom, it would be me.

Over 40 years ago, I was an abusive mom of our toddler daughter.

I feared I would kill her in one of my rages.

It seemed God had given up on me, because no matter how much I prayed to be a godly mother, nothing changed. Suicide seemed the only option, and I almost took my life.

But God intervened, gave me hope, and also gave me biblical and practical help to become the loving mom I wanted to be. Today, our family is intact and has healthy relationships.

So what can you do when mothering is overwhelming and feels hopeless?

Hope for "Failing" Moms

1. The story isn’t finished.

This might sound like a pat answer, but we feel hopeless because everything is going wrong. We believe our child’s life is ruined forever.

Think of the disciples while Jesus is in the grave. For three days they had no clue God was going to bring hope to the whole world through an astounding, unexpected act—the resurrection.

I certainly had no clue that God would not only help me become a patient mom and heal my daughter’s wounded heart, He would also open ministry doors that has included sharing my story in nine foreign countries, having over 60 books published, and sharing God’s hope in over 30 U.S. states.

None of us can predict how our powerful Father will use what seems hopeless. Because then His glory is brighter than ever.

2. What you are struggling with is only preparation for sharing help and hope with others.

Initially, I prayed for an instantaneous deliverance from my anger.

I couldn’t possibly comprehend any good coming from struggle.

But as I learned more and more, I could teach parenting classes and workshops.

I Peter 1:6-7 (ESV) tells us,

“In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

3. Have courage to share your struggle knowing you are not alone.

Satan loves to keep sin in the darkness of secrets. I thought I was the only one struggling.

I remember sitting during our church service after being angry toward our daughter that morning. I sat trying not to cry, and yet my heart was breaking.

The woman sitting next to me seemed visibly disturbed because I was so upset. I knew she didn’t know what to do, but I feared sharing because she would condemn me.

In time, God gave me the courage to share in the neighborhood Bible study I led, and my friends didn’t condemn me. They began to pray for me and hold me accountable.

James 5:16 (ESV) commands us,

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”

I saw God keep His promise of delivering me when I accepted His courage to tell others.

Whatever struggle you have is absolutely weak in comparison to your Heavenly Father’s power.

You will feel intimidated, but be courageous to share with others. If no one will help, keep sharing until you find the wise counselor you need.

What struggle seems too strong to ask for help from God and others?

Kathy Collard Miller has continued to be in awe of God’s ability to not only release His children from sin’s grasp, but also to use what He teaches us. God has used His journey for her through His opportunities to write over 60 books, speak in 9 countries and more than 30 U.S. states. Her memoir, No More Anger: Hope for an Out-of-Control Mom (available in print, Kindle, and audio) is her story, which also includes practical, biblical ideas for overcoming anger and being a positive parent. Kathy and her husband, Larry, of more than 50 years, are parents, grandparents, and lay counselors. They live in Boise, Idaho. Visit her at www.KathyCollardMiller.com.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Liza Summer at Pexels.

The Mother of Little Acts

Kathy Carlton Willis is one of the most encouraging women I know. In this Mother's Day UPGRADE, she has a message for all women about how we can "mother" others through little acts of kindness and love.

"Since I wasn't blessed with children, I never know how to feel on Mother's Day," Kathy says. "But God gives all of us, whether a parent or childless, ways to be a mother to others."

I (Dawn) have always felt a lttle upset for those who must face Mother's Day with sadness. Maybe it's a woman who has no children, or a child whose mother has passed away. I was so glad to read Kathy's positive words. We can all learn to "mother" others and bless them in countless ways.    

It may not take away the sting of loss or sorrow, but it gives us a way to channel our feelings for good.

Kathy continues . . . 

When I look up the word "mother" in my handy thesaurus, it says a mother protects, nurses, tends to, pampers, nurtures, raises, looks after, cares for.

In Hosea, Isaiah, Matthew, and Luke, God or Jesus are described as mother figures. To be godly, we too can take on the character traits of a good mother.

During this pandemic, I've witnessed so many doing amazing acts of kindness. What have we learned during this time about showing love?

All these little things amount to big ways we can help others. Lives were touched from more than six feet apart!

There are also many unnoticed acts of love.

Moms have to do thankless tasks. We can all take up the challenge to be unseen do-ers. Not seeking credit but spreading joy.

It doesn’t take a big action to have a big effect.

God sees every unseen act of kindness or service.

Little Things in the Bible

• The Widow at Zarephath used flour and oil and a few sticks for a fire to make bread to feed Elijah. She had enough for the remainder of the drought. (1 Kings 17:7-24)
  
• The tongue. In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. (James 3:5 NLT)
• The mustard seed. (Matthew 13:31-32; Luke 17:6)
• The widow who gave her last two coins. (Mark 12:41)
• The five-loaves-and-two-fish happy meal the mom packed to send with her boy. (Matthew 14:17; John 6:9)
• The sparrow. (Matthew 10:29-31)
• The number of hairs on our heads. (Luke 12:7)
• Moses’ rod. (Exodus 4:1-5, 17, 20)
• David’s sling and five smooth stones. (I Samuel 17:40, 49)
• Shamgar’s ox goad. (Judges 3:31)
  
• Samson’s jawbone of a donkey. (Judges 15:14-16)

In any struggle, God can use even the insignificant thing that is already in our hands to give us victory!

When Peter and John saw the crippled man at the gate called Beautiful, asking for alms, they didn’t have money to give, but through Jesus Christ, had something greater.

But Peter said, “I have no silver and gold, but what I do have I give to you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, rise up and walk!” (Acts 3:6 ESV)

Unseen Acts

Moms, caregivers, and others constantly perform acts of tiny service that go unseen. Not a day goes by without these little details.

If you’ve ever felt like your day is filled with mundane tasks, unnoticed by others and seemingly unimportant, I have a message for you.

Your affirmation and appreciation won’t always come from the recipients of your loving acts.

But God sees. He knows.

Your acts aren’t unseen, and you—you are not invisible. God not only notices you, He delights in you.

Zephaniah 3:17 (NLT) says:

For the Lord your God is living among you.

He is a mighty savior.

He will take delight in you with gladness.

With his love, he will calm all your fears.

He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.

I love the idea of God singing songs over me!

He takes delight in us. He notices us.

Think what would happen if we made a commitment to give freely. We’d be enriched by it and others will know they are cared for.

One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want. (Proverbs 11:24 ESV)

Everyday Mothering

1. Notice others. Say their names. Know their hearts. Pay attention to what they love.
2. Do a tiny act of kindness. When we serve others, it’s not insignificant. Sometimes, the simpler the act, the more it touches the recipient.
3. Don’t allow the mundaneness of everyday life to overtake being connected in community.

How will you “mother” others this week?

Kathy Carlton Willis is God’s Grin Gal. She writes and speaks with a balance of funny and faith—whimsy and wisdom. Over a thousand of Kathy’s articles have been published and she has several books in her Grin Gal brand. Her latest book is 7 Trials Every Woman Faces. Kathy is active as a book industry pro, and her coaching group, WordGirls, propels women toward their writing goals. She graduated with honors from Bible College and has served 30+ years in full-time ministry. Check out her Grin & Grow Break video devotions on social media. Learn more about Kathy here.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Pasja1000 at Pixabay.

Mother Was Right—What My Mother Taught Me and Why It Matters Now

Janice Thompson is my sister-in-love. We share a love for her mom, Adele Wilson. In this Mother's Day UPLIFT, Jan shares some of the powerful lessons she learned from her mother—lessons all of us in the "Wilson clan" have come to love and appreciate—and I hope they encourage you as well.

"I vividly remember the day when as a young adult I said to myself, 'Wow, Mom was right!'" Janice says. "Perhaps you look forward to the day your child "gets it" too!"

Yes, I (Dawn) remember a moment of awareness. I'd thought my own Mom didn't understand the complexities of today's culture, but as it turned out, the principles that guided her life were timeless—much like those that guided Adele Wilson.

Janice continues . . .

Mom and Dad grew up together in a children’s home, each having lost a parent at a very tender age. Raised with 180 other children they called family, they both speak with gratitude of the care they received and the friends they made.

They also, however, determined when they married to try to create what they had missed—a welcoming home and intimate family life.

Mom is the first to admit they were clueless where to start, but God had His hand on them. They became Christ-followers shortly after marriage and immediately began to seek His wisdom. Between their study of Scripture and surrounding themselves with Christian families they wanted to emulate, they look back on their 72 years of marriage and trace God’s hand throughout their journey.

They are now enjoying the fruit of that dogged determination as they changed the course of their family’s trajectory and created a living legacy that has left a blessed imprint on three successive generations.

Mom gave me many gifts—including ones I didn’t always appreciate at the moment! I still marvel at how, without a mother’s role model, God gifted her with extraordinary wisdom.

She was undeterred during my adolescent years—that unpaved section of life—when I burst out in a tearful, “You don’t understand me!” She was on a mission, however, and nothing stopped her from standing firm on every value she held dear.

Here is my short list of what she taught me then and why it matters to me now.

1. Pursuit of God’s best. “If you’re going to do a job, do it right—the first time.”

If I were ever tempted to skim the surface, I’d best think again. I dreaded her white glove inspection of my half-hearted dusting chore. Good enough simply wasn’t. God deserved the best I could give, and I was never to short-change Him or her!

Gratefully, she was relentless, and that value served me well in my academic pursuit, career path, and raising my own children.  

2. Pursuit of Family Harmony. Conflict resolution was a non-negotiable. Frustration, even anger, were acceptable expressions as long as it wasn’t accompanied by disrespect, yelling, or fighting.

In Mom’s words, “There is enough fighting in this world; when you entered the doors of our home, it will be a place of peace, joy, and support.”

Mom had mastered conflict resolution skills that somehow allowed me to feel valued and heard even as I stewed in my anger. This led to a joy-filled home where my friends longed to be. Laughter was the norm, and my friends were always welcomed.

I found myself applying those same conflict resolution skills as we raised our children and in turn, enjoyed the blessing of being “mom” to many of our children’s friends as well.

3. Pursuit of Wise Stewardship. This one still amazes me as I see how much she taught me about God’s values concerning the use of time, talent and treasure. Let me start with...

TIME: Mom loved and served sacrificially. She worked long and hard, yet would always greet me with a cup of tea when I’d come home from a date no matter the lateness of the hour. She enjoyed sharing every detail of my experiences and used those late night chats to help shape my values.

I realized shortly after marriage how much she shaped my wishlist for my life’s partner and kept me from settling for less than God’s best. My husband is still my best friend, and I have Mom to thank for helping me understand that priority.

TALENT: Giving more than you take was another top priority. Mom taught me to always look for ways to contribute. If you are faithful with what God has put in your hand, He will, in turn, bless you with more to give.

I can’t begin to describe all the ways that value has played out in my life.

TREASURE: Wise financial stewardship was another non-negotiable.

Mom (and Dad) always put God first, spent less than they earned, avoided the use of debt, worked toward long-term goals, and were generous toward others. Those habits prepared them to live comfortably now.

That example also prepared me for a career helping others wisely steward their resources and their families.  

4. Pursuit of a Proverbs 31 Woman.  Mom was—and still is—a very beautiful and strong, independent woman. She modeled pushing through obstacles to achieve goals.

While always supportive, it was not her job to make life easy for me. She taught me to own my mistakes, minimize excuses, and figure out how to resourcefully get back on track.

She believed in me when I felt vulnerable and encouraged me to step into my calling even if it didn’t look “normal” or “traditional.” My subsequent career path landed me in what years ago used to be considered a man’s world. I ignored gender, however, and never allowed inferiority to keep me from starting my own company. Mom taught me to push through the hard stuff and count my blessings with every opportunity to make an impact.

Like my Mom, you have little control over the legacy you inherited, but a great deal of influence over what you leave behind.

Since a legacy is inevitable, I encourage you to make it intentional because wisdom is challenging to transfer without it. Experiences and how you leverage them can turn brokenness into a blessing even when it doesn’t look like it at first glance. You don’t have to be perfect; just authentic and tenacious.

We have the powerful ability ever day to leave a lasting imprint on those we touch.

Prov 31:30-31 says,

She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed….

Charm is deceitful and beautiy is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised....let her own works praise her in the gates.

Mom, you were right on every point and I rise up today and call you blessed.

What makes you unique because of the legacy you’ve received? What value or wisdom point can you change or build upon to make the biggest difference in future generations you influence?  

Janice Thompson is the co-Founder and CEO of One Degree Advisors, Inc., a comprehensive wealth management firm focused on biblically-based financial solutions. Janice is a Certified Financial Planner®, a Life Stewardship Advisor, and serves on the Board of Directors of Kingdom Advisors. She has two married children with three grandsons and one granddaughter. She and her husband Tom live in San Diego.

Motherhood: A Bumpy, Painful Road to Navigate

I've watched Julie Watson's life for several year. I saw her godly heart. Her commitment to good health and positive choices. Especially her choice, with her husband, to give three children a home where they can grow in every aspect of their lives. In this special Mother's Day UPGRADE, she shares her heart about that "mothering" journey, and offers positive principles for all of us who are mothers or who work with children.

“Motherhood.  Why didn’t anyone warn me how painful it can be!” Julie says. 

Painful? I (Dawn) thought at times, "excruciating!" Though I see now, on the other side of parenting, all the blessings that came our way, I still have memories of frustrating, trying days.

Julie continues . . .

Before becoming a mother at the late age of 45, I used to dread Mother’s Day! Year after year, I watched friends attend special Mother’s Day celebrations, receive sweet gifts made by tiny hands who revered the ground they walked on, and sip on sweet gestures from husbands who did their best to make the day special.

Each year that just reminded me that I still wasn’t a mother. My husband did his best to make my day fun, as a mom to several “fur kids.” 

But the pain was real. It hurt. And, I was not alone.

I found many women felt the same way. Those who, like me, couldn’t have children of their own, or had lost children, had pain-filled memories of their childhood, or a poor relationship with their mother. There were many reasons for the pain, but it was there. 

Fast forward 17 years!

I became a foster mom to three beautiful children.

Yet, Mother’s Day still did not feel “real” to me, because nothing is official with foster kids.

It would be another two Mother’s Days until I got my wish!

Mother’s Day 2016 was truly my first. Yes, I received those sweet little hand-made gifts, happy smiles, big hugs, and all the yummy goodness that comes with it... for about an hour.

Then, it went right back into the toils of war!

Parenthood is hard! Being a mom is HARD!

All those years dreaming of it, yet I only pictured the warm hugs, smiling faces, and Norman Rockwell moments that filled my head from one too many Hallmark movies.

I neglected to focus on the screaming tantrums, sibling rivalries, moments of sheer chaos, and the first time I was told, “I hate you,” by those same sweet, little darlings I dreamt of for years.

Motherhood is gritty and unpleasant at best most days. At least, it was for me for several years.  We are just starting to turn corners now, but every few days they remind me we haven’t really—at least not yet. 

Yes, we have lovely moments sprinkled throughout our days and weeks. I treasure those... truly!  We talk and laugh, dance and sing, watch movies, and share the love of Jesus. We’re a regular family just like anyone else. 

But my kids have a past. It isn’t pretty, easy, or loving.

It was filled with neglect, abuse, feeling unloved and unwanted for years. One can’t overcome that overnight. No. It takes years! 

And so, we wait, love them, and work through their issues together, one day at a time.  We know God turns beauty from ashes and joy from mourning (Isaiah 61:3)!

Whether you’re a biological, adopted, foster, grand, or step mother, please know there are proactive things you can do to reach your child, as well as ways to cling to God during this bumpy and painful road of motherhood.

1. Listen

Open your ears and heart and hear what your children are saying—not just with their mouths, but with their behaviors too. 

Children often can’t process their emotions because they don’t understand what they’re feeling or have experienced. Get down to eye level with them and let them talk to you.

They may need to punch a pillow because they don’t know how to handle their anger. It’s ok. They just want to be heard and acknowledged that their feelings are real and they matter.

Spiritual Counsel—Go to the Lord in prayer, and listen to Him.  He will speak to your heart and refresh your spirit. 

“Be still, and know that I am God…” (Psalm 46:10). See also Jeremiah 31:25 and Isaiah 40:31.

2. Read their body language.

My kids always have tell-tale signs of their real feelings. I acknowledge what I’m seeing as well as what they say they’re feeling.

Then, we offer a safe space to talk about it and what it really means deep down. (For example:  they say, “I’m fine” or “I’m not mad,” yet their hands are balled up into fists.)

Spiritual Counsel—Use wisdom to decipher the truth and don’t let their fears control the outcome.

“But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth” (John 16:13). Also, “…let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance…” (Proverbs 1:5).

3. Speak life and positivity into your child. 

They hear so much negativity all the time. Remind them of their godly gifts and talents, and that God has a perfect purpose and plan for their life!

Spiritual Counsel—Read the Word to guide you in raising your child in a godly way. The Bible is great resource for parental guidance. 

“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it” (Proverbs 22:6). See also Jeremiah 29:11.

Are you struggling today with being a mom? You are not alone. Reach out to other moms for help and support! We need to stick together, not compare or condemn one another.

As soon as we realize we are stronger together, we might just come out of this bumpy, painful journey alive and sane!

What can you do to reach out to the children in your care and speak to their deepest heart needs? Who is in your “mom support group”?

Julie Watson worked in women’s and children’s ministries for 10 years as a Development and Executive Director before becoming a stay-at-home mom to three beautiful children. In 2016, God created a beautiful forever family when she and her husband, Shawn, were able to legally adopt the children. Julie now helps others find hope and freedom from emotional eating & unhealthy habits as a C.O.P.E. Certified Health Coach.

Graphic adapted, courtesy of Theo Rivierenlaan at Pixabay.