Let God 'Skim Off' Your Pride
Pam Farrel’s books for women have both encouraged and challenged me. This Attitude UPGRADE is one example of how God spoke through Pam to confront my own pride.
“One of the ugliest sins I ever had to confront was my own pride,” Pam wrote in Woman of Influence.
When I (Dawn) first read that, I thought: There are a lot of sins that are uglier than pride. But then the Holy Spirit started chiseling away on my own heart, showing me my own nasty pride. Pam’s right. It’s UGLY!
She continues …
Everywhere I turned, God was pointing out pride. All the illustrations I heard in sermons, all the topics at a conference I attended, all the conversations with other women of influence centered around pride.
I caught myself wondering how I could be guilty of pride, since so often I battled a self-confidence problem. Then God pointed out:
Oversensitive low self-esteem is pride turned inside out!
When I battle low self-esteem, I am still focusing on me. I am concentrating on seeking approval and encouragement. My eyes are on my needs, when God wants my eyes on Him.
During that time, God brought to my mind all the ugly words I had never voiced but had thought.
- Why is she so rich when I have just as much talent?
- Why is she teaching when I know as much as she does?
- Why is God blessing that ministry with huge numbers instead of ours?
In my complaints, I was telling God that His plan was wrong and mine was right.
Pride made me play God in my own life.
My heart was broken over my sin. I got away to a private place with God; I fell to my knees and wept. I listed every good thing, every compliment I could remember, and I thanked God for what He had accomplished through me, or rather in spite of me.
When goldsmiths create pure gold, they heat up the fire, and the dross and impurities come to the surface. The goldsmiths skim off the impurities until they can see their own reflection in the gold.
The author of Proverbs says, "The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests the heart" (Proverbs 17:3).
God’s grace brought my pride to the surface to be skimmed off. I wanted the impurities taken out of my life until people could see God in me.
Afterward, I wanted to keep my confession between God and myself, but God stoked up the fire again. I felt that He wanted me to openly confess my hidden sin of pride. I was afraid of the criticism my confession would bring on me. After all, I was a leader. I should have dealt with pride long ago.
God showed me when He wanted me to confess, and to whom.
I was discipling a small group of women leaders, and I shared my confession and restoration with them. Later, on a Sunday night, I stood up in front of our congregation during a share time and told the highlights of what I had learned from God.
I knew then I was free, because I didn’t care if they thought less of me; God had accepted me by His grace. My slate was clean.
I did hear some criticism through the grapevine, but mostly I felt personal relief for a burden laid down.
And there was another benefit: a new transparency developed in those who were following my leadership. Because I was honest enough to expose the ugliness of my sin, others felt free to ask for help with hidden areas they had battled for years.
Do you struggle with the ugliness of pride? Bring it to God and allow Him to skim it off and give you a pure, humble heart.
Pam Farrel with her husband Bill, are international speakers, and authors of over 40 books including best-selling Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti, Woman of Influence, 10 Best Decisions a Woman Can Make, 10 Secrets to Living Smart, Savvy and Strong, and her newest, Becoming a Brave New Woman. The Farrels, married 35 years, are relationship specialists who help people become “Love-Wise ."