How Does a Woman Honor God in Leadership?

Nali Hilderman is a confident, radiant woman of God who is careful to seek God for wisdom. In this Leadership UPGRADE, she offers solid, biblical counsel.

“If you find yourself in a position of leadership or power as a woman, you can honor the Lord in more ways than one,” Nali says. “Leadership and honoring God as a female are not mutually exclusive.”

      

I (Dawn) think this is such a timely post. The news lately is packed with all sorts of opinions about what women ought to be doing in regard to their position, status and role in the world. I appreciate Nali’s biblical perspective on women and leadership.

Nali continues…

As a college professor I often have young women seek council on career advice. Many of them wonder if they are wrong if they want to go graduate school or pursue positions of influence in the culture, because they wonder if that lines up with the biblical passages from scripture. 

I counsel many of these young women to seek hard and pray harder how they are supposed to glorify God with their lives, gifts and talents, and yet do so in a way that honors His design for their femininity and speaks truth to our world. 

If you find yourself in a position of leadership or power as a woman, you can honor the Lord in more ways than one.

Leadership and honoring God as a female are not mutually exclusive.

Here are three suggestions to act in a way that is honoring to Christ.

1. Check your motivation. Why are you in the position you are in, or why do you seek such a position? Is it because you have an “ax to grind” or is it because you believe it is the best use of your giftings?

Ask yourself, as you pursue potential career options or job positions, how you can seek to serve Christ in that position.

Often times we tend to seek power or influence because we want to make it “all about us” and fulfilling our desires and needs. Pray that you would follow the words of Colossians 3 when it says to “do everything” as unto the Lord.

2. Seek an attitude of “power under” as opposed to “power over.” Christ says the greatest in the Kingdom are those who love and who serve, and that is something all Christians should emulate.

Those in positions of power have a great opportunity to serve those around them with the love that God has poured out. Doing so from a position of power can speak the Gospel to those who need to hear it.

As our supreme example, Christ Himself (the ultimate position of power) humbled himself, became a man and chose not to be served, to but to serve.

3. Remember the Created Order. God’s Word seems to be very clear that there are specific designs and roles for men and women, yet all are created in His image – the Imago Dei. As a woman in a position of power, one must be careful to always remember that all humans bear the image of God and deserve respect and love.

Are you committed to treating both men and women around you in a way that honors the Imago Dei?

The issue of women in leadership seems to be increasing in 21^st century society and it is a difficult subject that often is filled with confusion on many levels. As Christian women serve in these positions, we must continue to seek the Lord in how we can do so in a way that honors Him.

Has God given you a position of leadership or do you have a desire to be a leader? Do you need to consider one of these suggestions as you move forward? Which is the most difficult for you?

Nali Hilderman is a professor of American history at San Diego Christian College and Director of the college’s Dr. Henry Morris Leadership Program. She studies women’s history and Christian theology, trying to make sense of how to be a confident, successful Christian woman who does not buy into the secular feminist mentality. She attends Journey Community Church in La Mesa, CA.

Graphic adapted, Image courtesy of stockimages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Helping Kids with Their GPS (God Positioning System)

Some women, like Deedra Scherm, seem to have been born with a parenting creativity gene. In this Parenting UPGRADE, she offers practical counsel for building spiritual insight into children’s lives.

“I was driving in downtown Dallas, trying to find my way to have lunch with my cousin Cathy,” Deedra says, “when I had to pull over to call my husband.”

Like Deedra, I (Dawn) often get turned around in the car. (OK, I get totally, horribly lost.) I used to feel terrible about that until I read somewhere that Einstein, a genius, often lost his way too. (Maybe that’s a myth, but I’m sticking with it!)

Deedra continues …

“I’m LOST!” I said with great frustration. “And I’m already 10 minutes late for lunch!”

“Okay," my husband said. "Just tell me where you are.”

“If I knew THAT, I wouldn’t be LOST!”

Shortly after that my husband gave me a GPS (Global Positional System) to help me navigate the roads. Is it too much to say I love my GPS? Because I do. I no longer have anxiety when I have to navigate new roads. I just turn it on and enjoy the path I’m driving.

My spiritual life needs a lot of guidance at times.  Over the years I have learned about the importance of reading God’s Word, prayer, and wise counsel, because I’ve discovered, “The mind of man plans his way, But the LORD directs his steps” (Proverbs 16:9 NAS).

I wanted to start teaching my children at a very young age how to understand the importance of God’s desire to guide their lives. 

Their “God Positioning System.” Their own “GPS.”

I thought I’d share a few easy ways to help plant seeds in young children on how to seek God’s guidance for themselves. The hope is that as they get older, seeking God’s guidance will become a natural part of their lives.

1. RECORD family prayers.

It seems like such a simple thing, but it can have such a great impact when you take the time to pray as a family and write down the requests and answers. The visual of written requests and recorded answers can make a lasting impression on a child about how God listens and responds.

When you record family prayers, it not only shows kids the importance of prayer, but it encourages them to seek prayer for themselves as they face decisions in their own lives. 

2. RECALL the times God has personally guided you.

Find ways to share moments where God has guided you and your family to where you are now.

When the boys are enjoying playing at the park next to our house, I like to say, “I remember when we were looking for a place to live and we just couldn’t find anything. Then we prayed for God to open up a house near this park. What a wonderful blessing He gave us with our house.” 

When you recall how you sought God for a decision point in your life, it will encourage them to seek His guidance when they are faced with decision in front of them. 

3. RELATE your child’s story to the story of someone in the Bible.

The Word of God is one of the main paths of guidance for us as Christians. Whenever we can direct our children to find connections to scripture, it will help them be able to relate as they get older.

When your child is experiencing fear, tell them about the story of Daniel and how God will take care of them in the scariest of circumstances.  When they are worried about if they are good enough, tell them the story of the boy with five loaves and a couple of fish and how Jesus can take what you have and use it for His glory. 

When you relate your child’s story to the Bible, it will encourage them to seek the Word for guidance when they are faced with challenging circumstances before them.

4. REMEMBER to show God’s provision in the “less-than-what-I-hoped-for.”

I remember circling a parking lot with my three boys in the car when the “front row” spot opened. “It’s the favor of God!” said one boy.  

At first, I was a little proud at his response. But as I thought about it, I realized that if I only thank God for the good things, when things get tough the kids could believe it’s because God has no hand in it. 

The next time we got the back-row spot, I said, “Oh, it would have been great to be in the front row, but maybe God knew I needed some extra exercise. Or maybe someone who has trouble walking needed that spot more than we did.” 

After time, I saw the boys applying this principle to all sorts of areas in their lives … from when they didn’t win the prize in the raffle to when someone else at church got the starring spot in the spring musical. 

When you remember to show God’s provision in tough times, it will encourage kids to trust God’s plan even when things don’t go their way.

What a great gift you can give to your kids if you teach them to have their own “GPS.” Then they can stop worrying about being lost, and really start enjoying the journey!

Can you think of a teachable moment when you recently taught a child (or a mentee or a friend) how to trust God for guidance? Which of Deedra’s four points could you use in the days ahead?

Deedra Scherm lives in Dallas with her husband and three boys. Between homeschooling and writing, she’s on constant watch for “parents night out” so she and her hubby can get one of those things called a date night. You can find Deedra’s  bestselling book, The ABC Bible Verse Book, and other books and DVDs at lemonvision.com or amazon.com. 

Let God 'Skim Off' Your Pride

Pam Farrel’s books for women have both encouraged and challenged me. This Attitude UPGRADE is one example of how God spoke through Pam to confront my own pride.

“One of the ugliest sins I ever had to confront was my own pride,” Pam wrote in Woman of Influence.

When I (Dawn) first read that, I thought: There are a lot of sins that are uglier than pride. But then the Holy Spirit started chiseling away on my own heart, showing me my own nasty pride. Pam’s right. It’s UGLY!

She continues …

Everywhere I turned, God was pointing out pride. All the illustrations I heard in sermons, all the topics at a conference I attended, all the conversations with other women of influence centered around pride.

I caught myself wondering how I could be guilty of pride, since so often I battled a self-confidence problem. Then God pointed out:  

Oversensitive low self-esteem is pride turned inside out!

When I battle low self-esteem, I am still focusing on me. I am concentrating on seeking approval and encouragement. My eyes are on my needs, when God wants my eyes on Him.

During that time, God brought to my mind all the ugly words I had never voiced but had thought.

• Why is she so rich when I have just as much talent?
• Why is she teaching when I know as much as she does?
• Why is God blessing that ministry with huge numbers instead of ours?

In my complaints, I was telling God that His plan was wrong and mine was right.

Pride made me play God in my own life.

My heart was broken over my sin. I got away to a private place with God; I fell to my knees and wept. I listed every good thing, every compliment I could remember, and I thanked God for what He had accomplished through me, or rather in spite of me.

When goldsmiths create pure gold, they heat up the fire, and the dross and impurities come to the surface. The goldsmiths skim off the impurities until they can see their own reflection in the gold.

The author of Proverbs says, "The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord tests the heart" (Proverbs 17:3).

God’s grace brought my pride to the surface to be skimmed off. I wanted the impurities taken out of my life until people could see God in me.

Afterward, I wanted to keep my confession between God and myself, but God stoked up the fire again. I felt that He wanted me to openly confess my hidden sin of pride. I was afraid of the criticism my confession would bring on me. After all, I was a leader. I should have dealt with pride long ago.

God showed me when He wanted me to confess, and to whom.

I was discipling a small group of women leaders, and I shared my confession and restoration with them. Later, on a Sunday night, I stood up in front of our congregation during a share time and told the highlights of what I had learned from God.

I knew then I was free, because I didn’t care if they thought less of me; God had accepted me by His grace. My slate was clean.

I did hear some criticism through the grapevine, but mostly I felt personal relief for a burden laid down.

And there was another benefit: a new transparency developed in those who were following my leadership. Because I was honest enough to expose the ugliness of my sin, others felt free to ask for help with hidden areas they had battled for years.

Do you struggle with the ugliness of pride? Bring it to God and allow Him to skim it off and give you a pure, humble heart.

Pam Farrel  with her husband Bill, are  international speakers, and authors of over 40 books including best-selling Men are like Waffles, Women are like Spaghetti, Woman of Influence, 10 Best Decisions a Woman Can Make, 10 Secrets to Living Smart, Savvy and Strong, and her newest, Becoming a Brave New Woman. The Farrels, married 35 years, are relationship specialists who help people become “Love-Wise ."

Living in Uncertainty: Waiting on God

Julie Watson is a gifted woman who not only has technical expertise, she also has deep compassion for people who hurt. In this UPGRADE, she encourages us with powerful words about patience.

“Having patience, standing in line, waiting my turn … these are things I learned in kindergarten,” Julie says, “but still didn’t do well ... until now.” 

Watching Julie in her long waiting season has inspired me (Dawn) and taught me to trust God’s timing. But what I value most are the lessons God has taught her.

Julie continues…

I quit praying for patience long ago because I realized every time I did, I’d somehow get stuck behind the slowest drivers known to man!

God is not surprised by my impatience, but for my journey, He gave me something very special to wait for.

Nearly 17 years ago I married the man of my dreams. As most young couples do, we made plans for our future. Children were a part of that plan. However, life throws you curveballs, and mine came in the form of a slow growing type of ovarian cancer. Long story short, having children—natural children, that is—were no longer in our plans.

We were saddened, but not devastated. God had other plans … perfect plans!

Fast forward to Easter week 2013. Adoption was always something we wanted to do once we found out we couldn’t have children. It just took us a LONG time to get there.

When my husband and I separately received confirmation from God that it was time to move forward (on Good Friday of all days) we were READY! And, when I say ready, we literally prayed someone would drop a child onto our doorstep the next day!

Needless to say, adoption doesn’t work like that. We waited… and waited… and waited some more.

Living in uncertainty is never fun. Waiting for something I had wanted for so long stirred a whole range of new emotions, and I learned some things along the way:

1) Don’t ever stop talking to God—keep praying diligently for His will to be done and leave your own will out of it!

2) Don’t stop listening to God—keep reading His Word, be still and allow His truth to penetrate your heart! (Proverbs 4:11-13)

3) Don’t alienate yourself by shutting others out—keep your support team on standby; you’ll need their continuous encouragement and prayer!

4) Don’t hold in the anger, frustration or disappointment—keep it real and be honest with yourself and God. You can even yell at God; it doesn’t surprise Him and He can take it—plus it might be very cathartic for you!

5) Don’t doubt the path God placed you on—keep your eyes on the prize and persevere! (Isaiah 40:31; Jeremiah 17:7-8)

6) Don’t stop planning—keep your priorities straight, your routines normal and don’t stop living just because you don’t know when “that something” is coming! (Philippians 4:12-13)

So yes, I hate waiting (even still). But, I now see God’s handiwork in the wait. I know the wait will equip me for the task ahead. And, I know that if I trust God and wait on Him, He will accomplish great things in and through me (Jeremiah 29:11; Romans 8:28).

Lastly, even while writing this article God revealed to me why I needed to wait for what was coming.

We were about to embark on the hardest journey of our lives and marriage.

We chose to open our home to a sibling set of abused and neglected foster children who needed a ton of love. But what do they need almost as much as love? A mountain-sized amount of PATIENCE (1 Corinthians 13:4a).

Had I not gone through this waiting game, I never would have been ready for the most important job of my life: motherhood.

Are you waiting on God for something? How can you use this time to prepare (physically, emotionally, spiritually) for what’s to come?

Julie Watson has worked with pregnancy care centers over the years and is currently a Grant Writer. She and her husband Shawn are new parents to three beautiful children who have forever changed their lives. The process of becoming foster/adoptive parents was neither painless nor short, but was well worth the wait. They know these children were hand-picked by God to be their own, and plan to adopt as soon as they are legally allowed.

Graphic adapted, Image courtesy of Ambro at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Timeless Truths for Financial Health

Janice Thompson encourages women to manage the money maze. She helps them consider their attitudes about finances, and points them to the timeless Word of God.

"It is hard to go a day without hearing financial news that makes us want to run and hide, even in relatively good markets," Janice said. "But there are timeless truths that can help us weather any economic climate, no matter what financial language we speak."

In previous posts, Janice detailed the financial languages women "speak"—the Driver, the Thinker, the Partner, the Avoider, the Idealist, and the Overcomer. In this post, she offers timeless truth from the scriptures for all women.

Janice continues ...

I would like to outline some principles that can help you weather turbulent times. Whether the current news is bleak or positive, these truths are always relevant.

These truths answer the question:

"In light of what's going on, what should I be doing with my money?"

They are universally wise, applicable in all economic climates, and are rooted in God's Word.

1. Do Your Best to Rein In Spending.

I continue to see two extremes as I discuss this point with women.

• On one side, there are those who are guilt-ridden over every dollar spent.
• On the other side, there are those making foolish spending decisions with little thought to their long-term impact.

I encourage you to find a balance between these two extremes that provides true quality of life for you and your family both now and with an eye for the future.

2. Avoid the Use of and Eliminate All Consumer Debt.

In most cases, the eradication of debt provides an immediate tangible "return on your investment," not to mention a tremendous sense of financial freedom.

I am amazed at the number of widows who either have already paid off their mortgage or indicate that as a primary goal when we first meet. There are, in certain instances, wise ways to use debt, but these uses should be sparingly applied.

The wisdom of Solomon reminds us that "the borrower is servant to the lender" (Proverbs 22:7).

3. Build and Maintain an Emergency Cash Reserve.

Conventional wisdom tells us this should be equal to at least three to six months' living expenses. I would suggest targeting a minimum of six months' living expense as a goal, particularly if you are a single parent or self-employed.

Again, quoting Solomon, "The prudent see danger and take refuge" (Proverbs 27:12). History shows us that volatile times are always both painful and inevitable. We can be less fearful if we do our best to prepare.

4. Consider Both a Proper "Asset Allocation Strategy" as well as "Purpose Allocation Strategy" for Your Investments.

Where you put your money should be based on your time horizon and risk tolerance, and centered on your mission, vision, values and goals.

Keeping an eye on the purpose for your various assets can help keep you emotionally balanced when facing turbulent times.

5. Stick to Your Strategy.

Irrational or emotional financial decisions can be extremely detrimental to your long-term financial future. Keep a level head and stay focused on what lies ahead.

6. Create a Comprehensive Financial Plan.

This will keep you focused on your mission, vision, values and goals in life.

When you are crystal clear about these important elements and have a plan that can be modified as God takes you through the twists and turns of life, it helps you maintain the proper perspective through the highs and lows.

7. Focus on Giving More.

A myopic view of the needs around us does little to enhance our mental health or our financial position. There will always be those around us with needs greater than our own. You don't have to look very hard to see them.

Great joy and personal satisfaction can be found in rocky financial times by taking the focus off of ourselves and putting it on others.

By giving, I'm not just talking about writing a check. Volunteer work with those in need costs very little and can give you a reality check about just how blessed you are!

8. Attitude Determines Altitude.

Economic downturns are a natural part of our free market system. You see these cycles occurring throughout history and, while never pleasant and always stressful, they are included in the historical progression of slow and steady upward progress.

So, while we cannot control events, your attitude will play a major role in determining your emotional and financial health. Billy Graham once said, "If a person gets his attitude toward money straight, it will help straighten out almost every other area in his life."

Since there are no "silver bullets" or "magic formulas" when it comes to the economies of this world, prudence and wisdom must prevail. Money does not buy true happiness. Solomon wrote that those who focus on money will never have enough (Ecclesiastes 5:10-11).

Happiness through wealth accumulation is not the goal, but the joy that comes through the wise stewardship of what you have been given. The truth is, "An undisciplined, self-willed life is puny; an obedient, God-willed life is spacious" (Proverbs 15:32, The Message).

Are you heeding these timeless financial truths? What area needs attention or improvement?

Janice Thompson is the co-Founder and CEO of One Degree Advisors, Inc., a comprehensive wealth management firm focused on biblically-based financial solutions. Janice is a Certified Financial Planner®, a Life Stewardship Advisor, and serves on the Board of Directors of Kingdom Advisors. She has two married children and one grandson. She and her husband Tom live in San Diego.

Note: Material adapted from the book, Managing Your Money Maze by Janice Thompson (Revive Our Hearts, 2009).