The Ultimate Life Upgrade

The Bible talks about one woman who certainly UPGRADED her life!

Dianne Matthews, who wrote the devotional The One Year Women of the Bible—reflections on women of the Bible and women today—writes about this transformed woman.

“While researching women in the Bible,” Matthews wrote, “I fell in love with the story of an unnamed woman in Samaria.”

She continues…

As I read the fourth chapter of John, I pictured this woman with the bad reputation plodding along the path to the village well. She occasionally paused to shift the weight of her clay jar. At least the other women can draw water in the cool of the day, she thought bitterly. She hated waiting until noon when it was hot, but she knew how they’d treat her if she showed up when they did.

What the woman didn’t know was that she would leave the well a short time later as a changed woman. A conversation with Jesus would upgrade her life.

Jesus’ request for a drink shocked her. Jews and Samaritans didn’t associate with each another. A Jewish man who drank from her water container would be considered unclean. Then Jesus made a mysterious comment: “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst” (verses 13-14).
 
Her curiosity aroused, the woman asked the man to give her this miracle water. Jesus responded by telling her to go get her husband. The woman probably stiffened.

“I don’t have a husband,” she answered. To her amazement, Jesus’ response showed that he already knew the sordid details of her life—that she’d had five husbands and currently lived with a man to whom she wasn’t married.

She didn’t like the direction the conversation had taken. The fact that this stranger knew all about her personal life horrified her. So she steered the talk away from herself. Surely this man was a prophet. Perhaps he knew the answer to the debate between the Jews and the Samaritans over whether Jerusalem or Mount Gerizim was the appropriate place to worship God.

Jesus explained that since God is Spirit, a worshiper’s attitude matters more than location. Then Jesus astounded her. For the first time in his ministry, he overtly revealed his identity as the Messiah. The woman’s mouth must have dropped open—she’d received more than an answer to a theological argument.

She'd just met the One who is the Answer to everything in life.

At that point, the Samaritan woman ran off to share the news. I find it interesting that the Bible makes a point of telling us she left her water jar behind at the well. I think it’s to let us know that she left much more than that.

When Jesus revealed himself as the Messiah, she understood that he offered forgiveness instead of condemnation for her sinful past. Besides her water jar, she left behind a heavy burden of guilt, shame, and humiliation, along with her old identity as an immoral woman, an outcast from society.

She began the new life of a woman accepted by God as a beloved daughter. The woman with the bad reputation had just received the ultimate life upgrade.

        How has God’s forgiveness changed your life?

[Photo credit of Jesus and the Samaritan woman - "Living Water" by Simon Dewey]

Dianne Neal Matthews is a freelance writer and the author of our daily devotional books including The One Year Women of the Bible and Designed for Devotion: A 365-Day Journey from Genesis to Revelation. She also writes regularly for websites and blogs (such as CBN.com and FindingGodDaily.com), and contributes to compilations (including Guideposts’ 2013 Mornings with Jesus). Learn more about Dianne at her website or connect on Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn.

Overcoming Fear and Regrets

We all have fears—big and small. Priscilla Jensen’s amazing story (read it here) is a testimony to the grace of God and how she overcame her fear of death.

“Because I was pronounced dead and got a second chance in life,” Jensen said, “I often get the question, ‘How do I overcome fear of death?’”

Maybe you don’t fear death, but there’s an UPGRADE lesson here for all of us as Jensen continues…

Everyone has some type of fear—heights, spiders, failing, speaking—they’re a fact of life, an emotional response to pending danger. 

I had to ask, “Why do some Christians have such a strong fear of death when we know what our eternity holds once we have put our faith in Jesus?” I feared death even after I’ve already experienced death.

Death: no possibility to change anything ... the finality of it all, at least of what I knew and saw.

The fear of death can be explained as the realization of being powerless against the inevitable, while making choices that can exacerbate the inevitable.

Maybe that is why so many people are afraid of death: REGRETS!

Regrets of the unfinished… mistakes… unfulfilled dreams… of anything else. We will never be able to live life having always made the right choice. We will always have regrets. I had tons of regrets. They secretly ate at me.

What would it look like if we didn’t have any regrets?

Is that even the right question? Could we live life with absolutely no regrets? I believe that is the wrong focus. Regrets are essentially always going to be focused on one person… me!

There is a huge difference between regrets and disappointments. Regrets are focused on what we did or didn’t do. Disappointments could be described as a hopeful beginning with an ending that is less than desirable. Regrets focus on us and our decisions. Disappointments focus on the outcome.

Imagine if we flipped that question around. 

What would it look like if the choices we make were all done to bring glory to God? 

We will still have disappointments, but our regrets would be astronomically lower. Why? Because it is no longer about us. Our lives were never about us; we’re not created for our own purposes. This has huge ramifications in every area of our lives.

This paradigm shift completely changed how I view life. Since my life was never about me, then who instilled purpose into my being? God did that. He bestowed His breath of life into me. He formed me. I am fearfully and wonderfully made! Not created for me, I was created for God Himself. God created me for His glory.

As I went through the process of overcoming fear of death the first years after that dreadful night (believe me, it was a real fear), time and again God, through His Spirit, counseled me regarding the ultimate purpose of why He created me. I was created in His likeness and to bring glory to His Name.

God freed me from the continuous pressure to live up to my own impossible standards,  buried by my regrets. Suddenly, I had a rope thrown down so I could crawl out my self-created pit.

When my focus was no longer targeted on me, a whole new world opened up. I had one task: bring glory to God. I needed to love Him with all my heart, soul and mind. I caught myself being in constant communion with Him.

The fear of death was taken away, because ‘to die is to gain’ (Philippians 1:21). I’m blessed to get a second chance in life—spiritually and physically! My focus is no longer on my death; my focus is on my decisions right now.

Are your thoughts, actions, attitude, relationships and everything else bringing glory to God?

Priscilla Jensen is a motivational and inspirational speaker and writer who was pronounced dead and is now living a daily miracle. She was born and raised in the Netherlands with Asian ancestry, and received her graduate degree in Intercultural Studies from Biola University. After living another 12 years in Europe, she and her husband and teenage son now reside in California, teaching at San Diego Christian College and helping to plant Catalyst Church in downtown San Diego.

The Importance of Forgiveness and Prayer

Renee Fisher, who started out as a voice for 20-somethings, now writes material that can move all of the Body of Christ to action. The following is an excerpt from her new book on forgiveness - UPGRADE material for not only our emotions, but also our walk with God.

"Prayer must accompany forgiveness," Johnson said. "Have you ever felt like Jesus can't hear you, and for whatever reason the crowds of this life try to choke you and keep you from crying out?"

Ummm, yes. Been there, Renee.

She continues ...

In these times, remember this:

Anguish leads to a powerful prayer life.

Don’t let Satan make you believe otherwise. When Jesus finally heard the blind man he stopped. Yes, that’s right. He looked right into his eyes - which could not yet see - and asked the man, “What do you want me to do for you?”

As Jesus approached Jericho, a blind man was sitting by the roadside begging. Jesus stopped and ordered the man to be brought to him.

When he came near, Jesus asked him,  “What do you want me to do for you?”

“Lord, I want to see,” he replied.

Jesus said to him, “Receive your sight; your faith has healed you.” Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus, praising God. When all the people saw it, they also praised God (Luke 18:35, 40-43).

What a powerful question. Thankfully this man didn’t hesitate. Instead of telling Jesus his sob story or trying to explain the reasons why he was blind, he simply asked.

You can do that too.

You can just ask.

We have that ability through the power of prayer.

In One Year Alone with God, Ava Pennington writes, “Intercessory prayer causes us to look beyond our interests as we become aware of the needs and burdens of others. . . Intercessory prayer is critical if we are having difficulty forgiving someone else. It is almost impossible to stay angry with a person when we ask God to help us see them through His perspective, and pray for Him to bless them abundantly!”

We might think prayer helps change God or speed up the process of healing, but in fact, it changes you!

Just like the blind man, we need more than just physical healing. We need to see God and experience His forgiveness!

Have you ever experienced the presence of God through the power of prayer as you ask Him to help you forgive? Why or why not?

(Adapted from Forgiving Others, Forgiving Me, © 2013 Harvest House Publishers.)

Renee Fisher, the Devotional Diva®, is the spirited speaker and author of four books including Forgiving Others, Forgiving Me. A graduate of Biola University, Renee’s mission in life is to “spur others forward” (Hebrews 10:24) using the lessons learned from her own trials to encourage others in their walk with God. Learn more about Renee at DevotionalDiva.com and ForgivingMe.com. 

How to Be an Encourager

Nancy Thompson, one of my mentors and a woman I called my “Counselor Mom,” went to the Father’s house recently. She was an incredible encourager.

It’s no surprise her family found a template for being an encourager in her Bible. Her son, Tom Thompson, read Nancy’s “Encourager Concepts” at her memorial service, and I asked him if I could share them as a special UPGRADE tribute to a woman who always let Jesus upgrade her attitudes.

The concepts come from I Thessalonians 5:8-11.

1. An encourager dwells on the internal rather than externals – faith, love and hope.  Attitude is more important than looks.

"But let us who are of the day be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love, and as a helmet the hope of salvation" (v. 8)

Nancy focused on reaching the heart and was big on examining attitudes, knowing they can change our direction. She knew where to go to get attitudes “back on track,” and spoke about “putting off and putting on” (Ephesians 4:22-24).  The Word is “so timely, so practical,” she once told me, “no matter the changes in the culture.”

2.  An encourager dwells on grace over works (acceptance over accomplishments).

"For God did not appoint us to wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us, that whether we wake or sleep, we should live together with Him" (vv. 9-10).

Nancy was a woman of grace, though she stood firm on biblical truth. She came to understand that fine line between following hard after Christ—living the abundant life—and descending into legalism. She knew performance must always take the back seat to a sincere relationship with God.

3.  An encourager dwells on unconditional over conditional.

As far as I ever saw, Nancy loved people unconditionally, and from that love flowed all the encouragement they needed. 

4.  An encourager dwells on tomorrow over yesterday – hope over hurt, potential over problems.

"Therefore comfort each other and edify one another, just as you also are doing" (v. 11).

Potential – that was a huge word in Nancy’s vocabulary. She seemed to see with the Father’s eyes, believing by faith that we were capable of more because of God’s Spirit within us. Nancy counseled and taught women because she knew “there is always hope” in God.

If you wonder how it was that Nancy was such a powerful, effective encourager, I think the answer is in Psalm 73:26, which was shared at her memorial.

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

No matter her circumstances, Nancy could love, give, serve, counsel and encourage because God strengthened her heart and poured Himself into her life. She was a willing vessel, and her encouragement touched people all around the world in missions, within the churches where she served so faithfully and in the lives of her family and friends.

Make it Personal:  With Nancy’s “Encourager Concepts” in mind, how can you become a better encourager?

Nancy Thompson was born July 4, 1923 in Brooklyn, Maine, and passed into eternity on July 7, 2013, at age 90.

She will be greatly missed by those who knew and loved her, and I have no doubt many will greet her in the Father’s house someday with grateful hearts.

My 5 'Rs' for a Long Marriage

A sweet young girl approached me at the book table after I spoke at a women’s event. “The woman who introduced you said you’ve been married almost 40 years,” she said. “What’s your secret?”

I’ve been asked that a lot lately, and I’ve been hesitant to answer (maybe because I have so many of my friends’ great marriage books in my library). I thought, “What more can I say?”

But I'm beginning to realize how few marriages last for four decades or more, so I decided I’ll share my own UPGRADE Your Marriage encouragement.

I think a good long marriage boils down to five "Rs."

(1) Remembrance

My husband and I remember our vows. There were no “if” statements on our wedding day, no back door escape clauses. We made commitments to each other until death. Those vows meant something. They still do.

(2) Responsibility

We took our Ephesians 5 responsibilities seriously. It started with verse 2 to “walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us…,” and continued through the verses about sexual purity and other godly behaviors as “children of light”—we learned how to walk in wisdom and submit to one another in love  (vv. 3-21).

Out of that understanding and growth, God gave us the strength and insight to embrace our “marriage responsibilities” (vv. 22-33). My husband strives to love me as Christ loved the church, and I seek to submit to him as to the Lord. Love and humility are to reign, not selfishness.

(3) Respect

One of my guiding principles is Ephesians 5:33: “let the wife see that she respects her husband.” Respect is a man’s core emotional need. If I don’t fill up his “respect cup,” who will? That is how he feels loved. So I let that respect begin at home, and I smile at him and praise him in public – letting the world know I’m “proud of my man.”

(4) Response

As his wife, I also want to be a faithful responder. I want to respond to his masculinity with biblical femininity and to his authority in our marriage. I respond to his advice and counsel, and support his goals and dreams.

I’m careful to be modest in public, but drop that modesty in private, responding to his need for physical intimacy. I respond to his human frailties with understanding, grace and forgiveness; and I give him a safe place to share his thoughts. I respond with gratitude and contentment for his provision (while recognizing that God is my ultimate Provider).

(5) Renewal – No marriage is easy. We need constant renewal—God’s wisdom, power and enabling. God’s Spirit helps us check our hearts and motives so we won’t put each other on pedestals or trample each other’s hearts. The closer each of us gets to God, the closer we are drawn to each other, so we try to seek Him and His plans first.

My friends who write marriage books offer many practical tips that complement each of these points, but when I keep these 5 Rs in mind, the rest seems to take care of itself.

Every marriage can improve. Which of these “R” words would UPGRADE Your Marriage today?

Dawn Wilson is the founder of Heart Choices Ministries and creator of UpgradeWithDawn.com and also blogs at LOLwithGod.com. Dawn's ministry encourages, edifies and energizes women with the truth of scripture so they can better enjoy life, bless others and honor God. She lives in San Diego with her husband Bob and a rascally maltipoo named Roscoe.